There are ways of reducing risk without condoms.

While the condom remains the "gold standard" for HIV prevention, there are other ways to reduce the risk.

An example we like is it's like riding a motorcycle. Riding on a well maintained motorcycle with a good helmet and proper protective gear (leather jacket, sturdy pants and boots) is a pretty safe way to travel. Riding a motorcycle with a front wheel that's out of balance and wobbling, bad brakes, wearing shorts and a t-shirt, no helmet and going 110 is asking for trouble. You might be able to ride many times like that and get away with it, but the odds are you're going to get hurt sooner or later.

Same thing with HIV prevention... Condoms are the best. Keeping your viral load down (i.e., being on meds and taking them every time your supposed to) will help. Using lots of lube and taking things slowly. Staying sober. Pulling out early. Going oral rather than anal. Knowing the HIV status of your partner. All are things that will help reduce the risk of transmission.

Can you guarantee that you'll never catch HIV? No. Same as riding a motorcycle. But with a little work, you can greatly reduce the risk and still enjoy the ride. (Sorry, bad pun.)